The University of Washington football record book lists some 2,000 men who’ve lettered in football over the past thirteen decades, spanning from Bob Abel (1919-20) to Bryan Zurek (1949-51). Broken down by position, these are the best names in school history:
QB Sonny Sixkiller (1970-72)
The biggest no-brainer on the roster, despite some strong competition.
Best of the rest: Wally Dash, Wee Coyle, Warren Moon, Kermit Jorgensen
RB Melville Mucklestone (1908-11)
Football star, or nineteenth-century private eye? According to a 1917 article in the Seattle Sunday Times, “Good old Muck” was “the greatest battering ram the University of Washington ever turned out.”
Best of the rest: Bishop Sankey, Rashaan Shehee, Corky Bridges, Burl Bufkin
FB Shawn Lightning (1987)
Perhaps the best possible last name for someone who’s carrying the football.
Best of the rest: Junior Coffey, August Buse
WR Hoover Hopkins (1983), WR Ja’Warren Hooker (1997-98)
You’ll never convince me Hoover Hopkins isn’t a lacrosse player at Towson. Ja’Warren, meanwhile, nets bonus points for teaming with Dane Looker to form the great Hooker & Looker tandem out wide.
Best of the rest: Stew Crook, Spider Gaines, Earl Younglove, Chico McClatcher, Joe Jarzynka
TE Trip Rumberger (1977)
You’re never going to believe this, but Trip went on to become a stockbroker and sailing enthusiast.
Best of the rest: Ace Bulger, Austin Seferian-Jenkins
T Chuck Bond (1934-36), T Chuck Bond (1963)
“Chuck Bond” isn’t inherently that great a name, although it does have a certain manliness to it; I just enjoy the fact that two guys with the same name played the same position at the same school three decades apart.
Best of the rest: Bing Nixon, Dick Day, Thron Riggs, Sir Aaron Mason, Bernard Bliss, P.A. Emerson
G J.R. Savage (1949-50), G Negley England (1932-33)
Two names at opposite ends of the spectrum: The first screams “tough guy” while the second, um, doesn’t.
Best of the rest: Firmo Breda, Chades Gasson, Jens Jellen, Bill Till
C Brad Hutt (1997-98)
When the quarterback is ready for the ball, all he needs to do is say the center’s last name.
Best of the rest: Royal Pullen, Opu Seminavage, Lester Gellatley
DE Deke Devers (1993-95), DE Harald Hasselbach (1989)
Alliteration alert! Hasselbach is particularly interesting: He’s a Dutchman who went to high school in Canada and went on to win both a Grey Cup and a Super Bowl.
Best of the rest: Otis Washington (the first player named Washington to play for the UW), Murphy McFarland, Hau’oli Kikaha (neé Jamora)
DT D’Marco Farr (1991-93), DT Junior Coffin (2001-02)
Just two great names—original, poetic, and cool. Bonus points to Junior Coffin for sounding so much like honorable mention fullback Junior Coffey.
Best of the rest: Tui Alaifefaleula, Toalei Mulitauaopele, Ossim Hatem, Vita Vea
LB Ink Aleaga (1994-96), LB Houdini Jackson (2001-02), LB Dick Sweatt (1970-71)
What a fantastic combination. Ink brings the poetry, Houdini brings the badassery and Dick brings the … well … he brings the Sweatt. But also the comedy.
Best of the rest: Rank Baty, Trenton Tuiasosopo, Chico Fraley, Justin Nnanabu, Lester Towns, Psalm Wooching
CB Le-Lo Lang (1986-89), CB Dawayne Rainwater (1992)
Le-Lo Lang sounds like he played saxophone with Count Basie; Dawayne Rainwater may be the coolest name I’ve ever heard in my entire life.
Best of the rest: Nesby Glasgow, Wondame Davis, Vonzell McDowell, Roc Alexander
S: Budda Baker (2014-16), S Taz Stevenson (2010-12)
Budda budda budda budda rockin everywhere, rockin everywhere.
Best of the rest: Mesphin Forrester, Hakim Weatherspoon
K Brandy Brownlee (1987)
Every all-name team needs someone who sounds like a supermodel.
Best of the rest: Cameron Van Winkle
P Thane Cleland (1983-86)
I can’t imagine going through life called Thane. I bet he gives a fake name to baristas.
Best of the rest: Dario Casarino, Channing Wyles
Coach Enoch Bagshaw (1921-29)
Some names sing. They please the ear. They roll off the tongue. This is not one of those names.
Best of the rest: Stub Allison, Victor M. Place